My mother is dead and everything is worse now

E06 In all the shots of the horse, you can see a paper coffee cup on the kitchen counter, but in the shots of Ethan, the coffee cup is missing. Was that because the show was making a statement about the fluctuant subjectivity of memory and how even two people can experience the same moment in entirely different ways? And I didn't have the heart to be, like, "No, man, some crew guy just left their coffee cup in the shot." And maybe this is like that coffee cup, maybe we're dumb to try to pin significance onto every little thing. My mother,she knew what it's like to feel your entire life like you're drowning with the exception of these moments, these very rare, brief instances, in which you suddenly remember you can swim. Mostly not, mostly you're drowning, she understood that too, and she recognized that I understood it, and dad. All three of us were drowning and we didn't know how to save each other, but there was an understanding that we were all drowning together. It had all the right pieces, but it just couldn't put them together. And when it got cancelled I was really bummed out, not because I liked the show, but because I knew it could be so much better, and now it never would be, and that's what losing a parent is like. Suddenly, you realize you'll never have the good relationship you wanted and as long as they were alive, even though you'd never admit it, part of you, the stupidest goddamn part of you, was still holding on to that chance. And you didn't even realize it until that chance went away. "My mother is dead and everything is worse now." Because now I know, I will never have a mother who looks at me from across the room and says "BoJack Horseman, I see you." But I guess it's good to know, it's good to know that there is nobody looking out for me, that there never was and there never will be, so it's good to know that I am the only one that I can depend on. And I know that now and it's good, it's good that I know that, so it's good my mother's dead.