And it breaks my heart, again...
after my heart was so broken that I thought
it could never get any more broken.
I thought it was safe,
but it still, somehow, finds a new way to break.
Because, even though, I'am the one who asked for this,
now that I've got it, I am completely adrift
with no compass, or map, or sense of where to go, or what to do.
So I go to Nanjing.
I think I might find community, a connection to something bigger,
but... I don't.
In fact, I feel even more alone than I was before I left.
But... I survive.
I learn that I can survive being alone.
I'm really happy for you